Our country director Phaeng takes us through a traditional wedding in Laos …
Lao Weddings are known as a South East Asian family event as we have our own unique and old traditional that have followed our ancestors for thousands of years. Last weekend I had the opportunity to go to a traditional wedding that Lao people attend.
A Lao Wedding is one event that busiest time for both families as the groom and bride need to prepare for at least two weeks or up to a month depending on the situation of the families. Both families would come together to talk about when is good time for them to have the wedding — this also includes the magic man. It is his job to come up with a good date as per the Buddhist calendar and animism day as well.
After a date is set, both families would need to make a list of the guests that they would like to invite — not only friends but also parents, uncles and aunts along with brothers or sisters. Even their close friends of friends would make the list of the people that they will invite.
In Laos we use one invitation for two people, so for a regular wedding about 500 – 1,500 invitation cards depending on how big the wedding is. The groom and bride will give the invitation cards out about one week or latest 3 days prior the wedding date.
The groom and bride would also look for some place for the all-important pre-wedding photo shooting. Some couples like to do this in the studio but others like to do outside like at the National Museum, their favourite temple or even at the stadium where they can get better scenery.
After taking the photos, they will choose the best ones to print in big size and put in frames to show off at the wedding. Guests even take photos with the over-sized bride and groom pictures.
On the wedding day, in the morning most people would hold a Baci ceremony at the bride’s house. Groom and bride would dress up in traditional Lao clothes and before the ceremony starts the groom would arrive at the house with a parade — people following and some people singing a song. After arriving at the house the groom has to enter as the girls use their bells to block the door we call Golden and Bronze Gates. The groom would pass it very easy by giving out the money envelop which he already prepared. After passing those gates and getting to the door a woman from the bride’s side takes him to sit in front of the Baci Tray that is full of things such flower stupa with cotton string and some holy leaves, boiled chicken and eggs.
After, the women from the groom’s side would go to get the bride from her room to sit beside the groom and family to sit around with magic man, also known as wisher man. Before the magic man start to chant, the village chief would come up with wedding certificate and would read out loud the details, including the dowry.
The magic man chants his blessing and ends the ceremony by tying up both the groom and bride’s wrists. With the Baci ceremony done, the couple gets up and walks to the bedroom, lead by the groom and bride’s mothers. After they get to the bedroom, both would pay their respects before they can sitting for photo. The bed is laid out with some holy leave, money and flower — to finish the morning the new couple toss these blessings in the air.
In the city we like to have both the Baci ceremony and an evening party. The evening party could be held anywhere that could hold more people who couldn’t be invited to the morning ceremony. It is tradition for invitations to come back with money inside — these are left for the couple at the wedding.
Guests are welcomed to the evening reception with drinks, normally whiskey. The wedding party and the their families form a lie to welcome guests to the party. The groom and bride will start the group off dancing and then others in a Lao style dancing. Lao style dancing is a much different style, with pairs and line dancing. The party could go until late with foods and drinks (usually serve with Lao Beer).
Lao wedding is very detailed — it’s a fantastic event for those who have never seen especially for people do not live in Laos.